hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
How external is "for external use only"?
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize
