i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
