she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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