Whod you bang
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize