I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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