he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
We had sex on a dog bed..
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.