I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
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