um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
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Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
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I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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