evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize