i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
