My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
