Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
