need another drink. this is the easiest way
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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