Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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