Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
jump out the window naked night went bad
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