Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
