I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize