You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
