JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
True strength comes from lack of pants
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
