ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
