don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
