The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize
