Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
