i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize