Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants