return my video game
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?