yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Randomize
