And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
