Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
