so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
