Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
