So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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