He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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