I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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