We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
