What a fucking waste of an outfit
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
