did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
i just made my gag reflex go away.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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