Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(336): View more from North Carolina

There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.

(336): View more from North Carolina

This is god's gift to the unemployed.

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(336): There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING. (336): This is god's gift to the unemployed. http://tfl.nu/uhcy

Replies (47) Good night (4460) Bad night (902)
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(630): View more from Illinois

is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?

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(630): is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit? http://tfl.nu/3vh4

Replies (107) Good night (1031) Bad night (13039)
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(916): View more from California

Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.

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(916): Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life. http://tfl.nu/lqwm

Replies (17) Good night (1292) Bad night (3557)
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(614): View more from Ohio

If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.

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(614): If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold. http://tfl.nu/55cb

Replies (14) Good night (5963) Bad night (916)
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(540): View more from Virginia

i really wish james franco would like my vagina

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(540): i really wish james franco would like my vagina http://tfl.nu/g4mj

Replies (25) Good night (5873) Bad night (1298)
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(847): View more from Illinois

No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.

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(847): No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv. http://tfl.nu/ej96

Replies (38) Good night (1848) Bad night (4235)
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(303): View more from Colorado

Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds

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(303): Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds http://tfl.nu/arjt

Replies (14) Good night (2572) Bad night (843)
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(517): View more from Michigan

In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.

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(517): In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast. http://tfl.nu/cv6o

Replies (4) Good night (2620) Bad night (1150)
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(503): View more from Oregon

Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.

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(503): Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate. http://tfl.nu/7ogi

Replies (13) Good night (2645) Bad night (906)
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(530): View more from California

Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.

(1-530): View more from California

at least it wasnt animals

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(530): Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences. (1-530): at least it wasnt animals http://tfl.nu/kq9s

Replies (3) Good night (974) Bad night (1484)
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(910): View more from North Carolina

I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.

(910): View more from North Carolina

My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.

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(910): I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford. (910): My sex life and finances are equally in shambles. http://tfl.nu/5ti1

Replies (4) Good night (698) Bad night (1219)
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(907): View more from Alaska

I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.

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(907): I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind. http://tfl.nu/12c7

Replies (3) Good night (800) Bad night (694)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm just crazy horny about you

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(215): I'm just crazy horny about you http://tfl.nu/n9zt

Replies (11) Good night (1825) Bad night (419)
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(847): View more from Illinois

The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.

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(847): The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one. http://tfl.nu/8fpw

Replies (2) Good night (804) Bad night (415)
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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar

(1-780): View more from Alberta, CA

To be fair I was thirsty

(780): View more from Alberta, CA

When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"

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(780): You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar (1-780): To be fair I was thirsty (780): When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!" http://tfl.nu/ztbw

Replies (1) Good night (810) Bad night (358)

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