9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
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