North Korea, Best Korea!
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
