Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
