thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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