I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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