something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize
