Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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