I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I just had sex on a roof
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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