I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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