I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
