so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
We need to rekindle our bromance
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize