I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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