We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
21 Sketchy Drug Deals That Are Scary AF
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
17 Women That Lost Condoms Up Their Lady Parts
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni