i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize